Tonight's perfect metaphor for life involves fireworks...a couple of hours ago, I felt like the ultimate failure. It was like this...
...It was dark, I was in the passenger seat, Geoff was driving and girls were in back. Hazel was sleeping and Kenzie was anxiously asking where the fireworks where. I was fuming as I stared at the car in front of us...friends who we recently met and have become very close to. We could hear the popping of fireworks but weren't close enough to see any, it was clear that our friends didn't know where they were going or where/when to see the fireworks and we'd missed them and I was so mad at myself for leaving Alki and couldn't imagine how I'd explain to my almost 4yo why she didnt get to see the fireworks we promised.
Prior to this we had a GREAT night though, fabulous company & yummy yummy food...not to mention the playdate the girls had which was just adorable.
Geoff was very mellow and accepting of it all, pointing out all the good times we had and the great friends we are making.
It got to a point though where ot was up to me. We'd agreed to head toward Bellevue to see what was going on but I recognized where we were from about 10 years ago and told Geoff no...to turn right instead. I am sooo glad that I trusted my instincts and went south to the northern part of Renton by the lake!! It was a perfect scene. Nobody was around, and we could see the whole southern tip of Lake Washington where fireworks were exploding all across the horizon the whole time we were there...and they were far enough away that Hazel didn't get woken up at all which was absolutely an added bonus to say the least!
I could have just kept sulking in the car feeling sorry for myself or being angry at myself for changing the plans last minute...I am so glad that I didn't.
My lesson tonight was to trust my instincts. I knew that it was important that Kenzie saw her friend, Geoff and I have been stressing out so much these days trying to get our numbers out of the red that she needed the fun play time with a friend...and we needed to step away from our problems for a couple hours. We decided that the friendship was more important than being on Alki for the fireworks, I still think that's true and was a good decision, and in the end with the beautiful show that the girls loved it was even better since Hazel didn't have to suffer from the noise, at least not until we got home.
As soon as I saw how clear it was and the lights were popping up in the sky there wasn't an angry bone in my body just pure relief. Kenzie got her fireworks & her playdate.
How we're going to get through this next week I don't know, the important thing is I know we will. We have so so many good things going on right now it is just a matter of time before we get everything back in line.
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