Wednesday, March 25, 2009

10 days left until Hazel is due...

I have been waking up at different times through the pregnancy...I remember in the second trimester, it was about 1:30am like clockwork...now we've progressed (?) to about 3-3:30am. Usually I feel a bit hungry, despite having eaten a good dinner, and I'm able to go back to sleep, this 'usually' statement though is based on the second trimester insomnia though. I've been up now for about an hour and a half...I ate a yogurt, and tried to go back to bed, but it just didn't work, hence my being awake right now.

Hazel got the hiccups though, which was nice, while I was trying to go back to bed. I say this is nice because:
  • I know she's facing the right way because of where I felt the hiccups
  • I love feeling her little movements, each one is a sign to me that she is doing well in there
  • It's nice to know I'm not the only one up at this crazy hour
I was thinking about all sorts of things, see, turning my brain off long enough to fall asleep is the hard part. There is so much to think about!

One thing that I am very excited about, is that my husband, who has been going through some major personal growth, has the same goals in mind as I do regarding when we plan to move into the house that is currently unfinished. In my mind...the ideal time would be before the pears are ready for harvest. It's not the clearest or most defined time frame, it is more based on my desire. Part of what I am looking forward to in regards to living in the house involves having a garden, a safe place to live where we don't have to worry about waking people up if we are laughing boisterously and taking the next step in our marriage/family as well. It will be a major major accomplishment to be moved into the house considering the amount of work he has put into it and it will be so fulfilling for him, and exciting for me to see it all come together. He stated his intentions today...as July. He stated this independently of my pear tree desires (which have only been floating in my head) and so it was kind of an exciting moment to 'just be' on the same page with our intentions and idealistic thoughts.

It is an exciting journey as we're creating the life that we desire and we're not holding back.

I'm so grateful for the opportunities and experiences that I have that have taught me that we do not have to play by the rules. We are working hard at developing opportunities for ourselves by the dozen and we both have the drive and passion to enjoy doing so. I am happy that we are creating a life for our daughters that will include us both in it. Neither of us really consider it to be 'working' so long as we are doing something that we feel passionately about, and we're fortunate to be passionate about so many things, most passionate about living life, seeking opportunities, helping people, and creating the family life that we have both only ever dreamed about. It's happening and it is beautiful.

Maybe I can sleep now that I've gotten all that out.

...oh one more thing! Kenzie will be officially 3.5 tomorrow (3/26) so I have let her know that it looks like she has met that landmark before Hazel's born. I'm excited to have some special surprises and treats for her so we can celebrate. Every moment I spend with her is so precious...she is my only daughter right now and we have been through so much, I want her to feel as involved and a part of the process as possible.

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